Wednesday 29 July 2009

Saying goodbye to my mum

I think this is my 500th post, so it is only fitting that I write about something important to me, and very personal. This time when we came to the New Forest, I brought my mum's ashes with me. She died two years ago and was cremated. I wanted to find a special place where she could rest, and had originally determined upon Romsey, as that was where she was born and grew up, but I wanted absolute privacy and finally decided upon a favourite spot of ours in the New Forest. We used to go to the Forest most Sunday afternoons in the 1960s and had lots of favourite spots. I chose our "favouritest" today and Keith and I strolled through the heather, avoiding dog walkers in the distance, and were 'led' to a beautiful glade in a little stand of silver birches (my favourite tree). It was absolutely perfect, and although it was a grey day, threatening rain, there were birds twittering in the trees above us, and ponies nearby as I scattered her ashes. Mum would have loved that - she was always happier with animals than people because she was very deaf and had no confidence around people. I shed a few tears, mainly because of thinking of childhood days there and wishing I could turn the clock back for just a little while. But it is time to move on now.

We went to Salisbury Cathedral, and I said a little prayer and then we had a lovely afternoon walking round the Museum, which has an excellent Archaeology department and the biggest collection of prehistoric pots I've seen in many a long year - the Wessex chalk has protected them well.

14 comments:

Donna Gotlib said...

Thank you for sharing such a personal moment. I am sending warm thoughts your way.

mrsnesbitt said...

How lovely! HUGS to you.
Dxxx

Rowan said...

I'm glad that you found such a lovely place for your mum, I,too, saved my mum's ashes and scattered them in a bluebell wood where we spent many happy times in my childhood. I found the final goodbye very hard but one day I shall join her there - though hopefully not for quite some time yet!

Morning's Minion said...

I think we lost our mothers at about the same time. It takes a long time to be accustomed to the fact that a parent is no longer here. I read a book and think, "Mother would appreciate that"--same with a piece of music.
It sounds like a lovely and peaceful spot where you left the ashes.

Bovey Belle said...

Thankyou for your kind words. I felt very relieved afterwards. I know just what you mean MM, with things your mum or dad would appreciate. I still see animal orientated gifts and think, Oh, I'll get that for mum. It was the same after dad died, only it took longer to shed the habit.

Goosey said...

Sounds like a lovely place to remember your Mum, hope you will be able to find that glade again in the future and enjoy it again.

sukipoet said...

a lovely story and i think your moms ashes will be happy there in New Forest. My mom died less than a year ago so i know there are lots of emotions and hard spots that arise around a mom's death.

Elizabeth Rhiannon said...

I think thats beautiful...blessings to you ~ER~

Diane Shiffer said...

What a wonderful way to honor your mother.. and to enable you to remember in a special way every time you go to that spot. I think losing one's mom must be a profoundly life-changing experience. I'm not there yet so I can't say I know how you feel, but I'll be praying for you♥

Bovey Belle said...

Thank you everyone. I had done my grieving before mum died as she was going downhill (strokes) very much for the last couple of years of her life. But spreading her ashes of course brought some emotion to the surface again - it was such a favourite bit of the Forest for us and brought back many memories - mainly of mum and dad sat behind a windbreak with the primus stove and the Sunday papers!

Anonymous said...

What a beautiful post; thankyou for sharing such a personal moment. It humbles me and puts everything into perspective.

Kim said...

I'm glad you found such a lovely and peaceful spot Jennie. Take care.x

Kim x

nancy said...

God bless you, my dear friend.
I was able to travel by boat to a remote Alaskan spot where we spent many happy years when my daughter, Libby was a child. The place is abandoned now. We went as a family and scattered her ashes there, each of taking a handful and going to a personally favorite spot to cast them.
I can sort of know what kind of time it's been for you.
Sorry I haven't been around lately, but always thinking of you.
Love,
Nancy

Greentwinsmummy said...

Dearest lady x
Hugs to you,what a lovely last thing to do for her xIts a beautiful place the New Forest,the one bit of that area I miss really,its a bit far from here now to pop there very often!
It was a complete joy to have you visit,the smalls adored you both :o) & the books!bless you! their favourite so far is the one with the ruined house in?with all the creatures that now live there,they are mesmirised by it :o)
Hope you have a safe journey back & you are most welcome to stop in for a return journey cuppa lol!
GTM x x x